2024

In a raucous showdown at the 2024 DTTC Memorial Invitational, the Thunder Cunts edged out the Dick Touchers with a score of 134 to 122 in a Modified Stableford format. Leading the charge for the Thunder Cunts, Vinnie Biros stunned the crowd by shaving 28 strokes off his 2023 performance, proving that miracles do happen. Rookie sensation and professional boozehound Brian Sharlow made sure to leave his mark—literally—by pissing on the floor, a fitting tribute to his wild card status. Scott "Upper Mid Dog" Weaver turned in a stellar round, with only a minimal amount of cheating, while Dan Vish, overcoming the temptations of hot dogs, broke 90 and secured a solid score.

On the other side, Captain Country Club, Matt Welch, did his best to keep the Dick Touchers in the game with the low score of the day. Shane Mooney also delivered with a commendable round of 84, but it wasn’t enough to tip the scales. Dan "Dandeep" Snyder showed the kind of consistency only a mother could love, improving his score by a massive one stroke from 131 to 130, but at least he scored some points. Meanwhile, Squeaky Nick had a performance that could only be described as a geological disaster, crumbling worse than a piece of limestone left in a thunderstorm, and ultimately contributing to the team's defeat.